Forget missionary, it’s time to master PEGGING! Tracey Cox reveals the surprising sex moves that are all the rage in modern bedrooms (so how many have YOU tried?)
- Tracey Cox reveals the surprising sex moves on the rise among couples
- Previously ‘taboo’ moves such as ‘pegging’ are proving popular in the bedroom
- The sex expert says it’s important to be aware of any health risks involved
- WARNING: GRAPHIC CONTENT
Tracey Cox – Mailonline – 01/11/2017
Think mastering the ‘Wheelbarrow’ position is pretty impressive, and doing it in front of a mirror terribly risque?
Time to update what you think of as ‘normal’ between the sheets.
Many sex practices that were once thought taboo are now the norm in bedrooms across the UK and US.
Up for some ‘pegging’, ‘tea bagging’ or a sex party? Read on!
One word before you do though: as with all sexual practises (but most particularly anything slightly unusual), these are only to be practised with consensual and willing partners after discussing.
There are also health risks associated with some, so do your research before barging on in there.
I remember writing about pegging about 20 years ago and everyone’s reaction was ‘What! My boyfriend/husband’s not gay, why the hell would he want me to do that to him?’
Pegging was the hottest sex trend in 2016 and far from being a fad, is fast becoming something most couples try at least once.
For those not in the know, pegging is when a woman penetrates her male partner with a strap-on dildo.
There are ancient drawings of pegging, so it’s nothing new, and it’s been a popular theme in porn for decades.
It moved into the mainstream in 2001 when US sex commentator Dan Savage, author of the Savage Love column, held a contest to come up with a name for the practise.
Pegging is now commonplace – it got a mention in the cult TV show Broad City last season, dominates the headlines in online sex blogs and magazine websites and there’s an entire Reddit discussion dedicated to it.
Not so long ago, the only sex parties held were for swingers.
Fast forward to 2017 and you have a myriad of sex soirees to cater for every whim.
Even This Morning’s Eammon Holmes has been to one (though it was research for a TV show…well, so he says).
Killing Kittens is one of the most popular and well-known sex parties and particularly appeals to bi-curious women who pay to attend ‘high-class events’, usually held in country homes.
Once there, mix with other lingerie-clad women (and hand-picked men), or disappear to a dungeon equipped with whips and chains or a ‘play room’ for some heavy petting.
The Eureka Club in leafy Kent regularly holds themed sex parties (including one for ‘bootylicious big, beautiful women’), while Club Hermione holds monthly sex parties in London (invitation only for this private club which demands men wear suits).
The Skirt Club caters for bi-sexual or bi-curious girls who want to play with girls, Passion Elite holds sex pool parties with fire-eaters and burlesque dancers thrown in for good luck.
Finally, for the traditionalists, there’s the good old Torture Garden, one of the best known and oldest fetish clubs in London.
There’s even a sex festival: ‘Flamefest’ has live bands, yoga tents, gourmet food and adult play areas where people can go to have sex with their partner or strangers or to be whipped by dominatrixes.
There’s no shame in attending sex parties either; plenty of attendees are proud to post on social media.
Fifty Shades may have brought it to the forefront but around 37 per cent of people in the UK have engaged in some form of bondage or blindfolding.
According to recent research, BDSM is the second most popular sex fetish in Britain (filming yourself having sex tops the list, in case you’re wondering).
There’s a huge difference between BDSM (bondage and discipline, dominance and submission), and sadism and masochism (inflicting or receiving physical or psychological suffering on others or yourself).
Most BDSM devotees role-play scenarios with safe words in place rather than inflict serious pain, with either stopping proceedings the minute it strays into uncomfortable territory.
Think handcuffs and blindfolds and pretending to be each other’s sexual slave.
One person is dominant, the other submissive – though lots of couples switch between the two roles depending on their mood.
Despite the anus being rich in nerve endings, it wasn’t so long ago that anal play was considered either ‘unhygienic’, something only ‘closet gays’ did, or just plain ‘disgusting’.
In 2017, roughly 40 per cent of women, aged 20 to 24, have tried anal sex and around 20 per cent of women in relationships have had anal sex in the last three months.
Your average couple are much more willing to own up to having anal than your parents generation and both men men and women now admit to enjoying anal sex or anal play.
Sex toys designed especially for anal stimulation are one of the biggest rising categories in sex toys.
‘Twenty years ago, anal toys meant anal beads and butt plugs; now there are dozens of types of anal toys for him, her and couple play,’ says Bonny Hall, product director of Lovehoney, one of the biggest UK sex toy retailers.
Sophisticated prostate massagers are a huge hit on the Lovehoney website, as are ‘double penetration’ toys.
It’s not just happening in the UK: there’s been a dramatic rise in heterosexual anal play in America, as well.
According to recent US research, 37 per cent of straight American women have anal sex (and other studies suggest that figure is conservative).
Anal sex or anal play blogs always have been and continue to be the most popular of all the ‘how to’ blogs I post on my website.
Samantha did it in Sex and the City (then again Samantha did pretty much everything there was to do), but you’d be surprised just how many women are joining her.
For the uninitiated, tea bagging is when a man puts his scrotum into his partner’s mouth and then dips it in and out – as you would dunking a tea bag into hot water.
There’s no obvious pleasure for the person doing the tea-bagging – other than giving pleasure to your partner – but since lots of men love having their testicles and scrotum stimulated, it’s fast gaining popularity.
Lots of couples do it purely for a laugh, others for the challenge and lots more simply because it something new that feels good for him.
It’s officially called Urolagnia – deriving sexual pleasure by the sight, thought or feel of urination.
Peeing on your partner or having them pee on you is also called ‘water sports’.
Why have golden showers crossed the line from something rarely talked about to a highly popular theme on pornography sites?
President Trump had something to do with it: rumours that he allegedly paid for sex workers to pee on him drew world-wide attention to the practise.
Men are far more likely than women to be urophiliacs and want to be peed on; women are far more likely to be the ones doing the peeing.
Some like the feeling of being degraded or degrading their partner but more often the appeal is simply because it’s one of the few sexual acts that remains ‘taboo’ – even if it’s more common than you think.
Vaginal fisting – inserting a fist inside the vagina – has long been practised in the lesbian community but it’s becoming far more common with heterosexuals as well.
It’s not just men who are keen to try it – young women are now more likely to search for the term ‘fisting’ on porn sites than men.
Accessibility to porn, social media and casual sex apps like Tinder mean twentysomethings have grown up a lot less inhibited than previous generations, and are less likely to categorise sex activities as something ‘gay people do’ or ‘straight people do’.
Despite still being a process that requires a lot of time and patience and something that must not be even attempted by anyone who isn’t highly enthusiastic to try, fisting has nonetheless jumped the fence from ‘don’t even think about it’ to ‘maybe’.